I've been away from the blog for quite some time. While many things remain the same (like the fact that I still hate Facebook and still miss many of my departed expat buddies), there's lots of change shakin' in our household these days.
So while I haven't written in a while, I have been thinking about what I would write when I finally did return. And the fact I was still thinking about it told me it was time to just do it.
While on my self-imposed sabbatical, I did find myself reading quite a few blogs by other expats. Some of them are funny and help me feel more connected to others by knowing I am not flailing in isolation, but others made me want to spit at my monitor and bemoan the fecklessness, foolishness, and lack of appropriate punctuation. It got me thinking about why we write blogs in the first place. I always said I would never do it as I find it completely self-indulgent and, frankly, a little narcissistic to think anyone would care enough about what I have to say.
This thought translates to all forms of social media, actually. Early on in my blogging career (which, mind, spans less than a year), I described my efforts to be more connected by means of technology. Almost a year on, I realize I don't want to be *that* connected. In replacing real social connection with technological interaction, relationships become strained and false. Now don't get me wrong - I keep a Facebook account and a Skype log-on as I rely on those methods to keep me connected to people with whom I want to be connected - people with whom I would write letters and talk on the phone given no other speedier, full-color option.
But excessive technological connection actually degrades the quality of our real relationships by leading us to believe that we are truly connected to people because we 'friend' them. However, with no real follow up or investment, these friendships feel false and empty as we think, on the surface, that we have a great social network. But when it comes down to brass tacks*, how many of these people really play an active role in our lives?
We all only have so much energy, so I have made the decision to focus my little bucket 'o glee on fostering those relationships that represent more than a voyeuristic 'through the keyhole' glimpse at someone else's life by way of an online profile and instead try harder to connect with those people that mean a lot to me by growing our friendship. And I might even use a little technology to do it.
A lot has been written recently about the mental effects of having too much access into another person's life with whom you do not have a close friendship. Knowing that the long-distance friend who does not seem to have time to respond to your latest email but has the time to post 15 status updates in an hour can be unnerving. Or what about the friend who was really more for a casual acquaintance but now feels the need to comment on every post you make? Or the person who spies photos of a party on your wall and realizes they weren't invited and kicks up a fuss? Even Kahlil Gibran, author of the ubiquitous wedding reading, "The Prophet", advised us to "let there be spaces in your togetherness". Now if only there were an option for that in your Facebook privacy settings.
So that all being said, I've always thought myself to be a little self-indulgent and narcissistic anyway (hey, man, we all are), so I'll keep blogging away, just perhaps a little less often and a lot less about my personal life. Watch this space...
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* Ever wonder where that phrase comes from? Wonder no more. I'm not sure I really care, but when I looked it up and saw there was reference not only to my motherland of Texas, but also to the hometown of a bestie, I thought it worth mentioning. Spread the word.
Showing posts with label technology. Show all posts
Showing posts with label technology. Show all posts
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
The Break Up
There's someone in my life I am considering breaking up with. He takes up too much of my time, spreads gossip about me to other people, and embarrasses me with bad photos and even more cringe-worthy comments. He forces me to acknowledge people that are probably best forgotten, and he forces people to remember me when I'd probably prefer some of them didn't. He makes me feel like that awkward high school kid and a coming-up-on-middle-age fogey all at the same time by jamming almost every social relationship I've ever had into one tiny cyberspace.
Yeah, I'm talking about you, Facebook.
I was a latecomer to Facebook, only signing up about 18 months ago after much effort to avoid. And at first it was bliss. I could be a voyeur in the lives of people I had always wondered about. I could accept a friend request, peek at someone's photos to see how they aged, check out who they married, and what they did for a living. Problem is, my curiosity really ended there. But instead of a tidy and brief 'through the keyhole' interaction, I spent the next months blocking pokes and flair and hugs from people I'm certain I will never see in person again.
So I went housecleaning. I've always loved a good clear out, so I started defriending that guy who went to another school who I couldn't really remember but swears we met at a debate tournament in junior high once. I defriended anyone that I knew in my heart of hearts I either was never really friends with to begin or would never see again (and didn't regret the fact). I even managed to figure out how to block all those annoying applications that were desperate for my details. And peace reigned... for a while.
Then I went messing with my privacy settings. I locked my profile down so heavily no one could see anything. Which, frankly, wasn't a huge problem for me. Until it was. And I started getting flack from others asking why they couldn't see my wall, my photos, my status updates, etc. I'm usually pretty good at managing to offend people myself in real-lifesies, so I sure don't need the added complication of unintended cyber offence*.
I really wish I had the cahones to just quit Facebook altogether. But as a stranger in a strange land, it plays a role for me of keeping me in touch with my people**, and that's important. I like keeping up with my high school peeps and those friends I've made around the world. But I do wish some of the recent trend to be offended by Facebook activities would cease, as it is making what is supposed to be a fun way to keep in touch seem like hard work.
And, really, if you think about it, the stuff we share on Facebook with the people that don't really know us is quite astounding. This video from BBC3 summarizes it perfectly (and gives a giggle to boot):
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* Heck, if I'm being honest, sometimes offence probably was intended. Which makes me like Facebook even less as it makes me do petty and impetuous things.
** And to my 'people' - don't be miffed with my diatribe. I may want to break up with Facebook, but not with you. So no hurt feelers or looking for yourself between the lines in my message.
Yeah, I'm talking about you, Facebook.
I was a latecomer to Facebook, only signing up about 18 months ago after much effort to avoid. And at first it was bliss. I could be a voyeur in the lives of people I had always wondered about. I could accept a friend request, peek at someone's photos to see how they aged, check out who they married, and what they did for a living. Problem is, my curiosity really ended there. But instead of a tidy and brief 'through the keyhole' interaction, I spent the next months blocking pokes and flair and hugs from people I'm certain I will never see in person again.
So I went housecleaning. I've always loved a good clear out, so I started defriending that guy who went to another school who I couldn't really remember but swears we met at a debate tournament in junior high once. I defriended anyone that I knew in my heart of hearts I either was never really friends with to begin or would never see again (and didn't regret the fact). I even managed to figure out how to block all those annoying applications that were desperate for my details. And peace reigned... for a while.
Then I went messing with my privacy settings. I locked my profile down so heavily no one could see anything. Which, frankly, wasn't a huge problem for me. Until it was. And I started getting flack from others asking why they couldn't see my wall, my photos, my status updates, etc. I'm usually pretty good at managing to offend people myself in real-lifesies, so I sure don't need the added complication of unintended cyber offence*.
I really wish I had the cahones to just quit Facebook altogether. But as a stranger in a strange land, it plays a role for me of keeping me in touch with my people**, and that's important. I like keeping up with my high school peeps and those friends I've made around the world. But I do wish some of the recent trend to be offended by Facebook activities would cease, as it is making what is supposed to be a fun way to keep in touch seem like hard work.
And, really, if you think about it, the stuff we share on Facebook with the people that don't really know us is quite astounding. This video from BBC3 summarizes it perfectly (and gives a giggle to boot):
_________________________________________________________
* Heck, if I'm being honest, sometimes offence probably was intended. Which makes me like Facebook even less as it makes me do petty and impetuous things.
** And to my 'people' - don't be miffed with my diatribe. I may want to break up with Facebook, but not with you. So no hurt feelers or looking for yourself between the lines in my message.
Saturday, September 19, 2009
College by Computer
I’m in Paris at the moment. You might wonder why I’m blogging while on holiday, but holidays are not the same for Husband and me as for most other folks. We spend our ‘real’ lives talking and thinking and explaining, so when we go away, we want to do none of those things. So here we are, in the most visited tourist spot in the world (Honest!), and we are doing nothing.
Actually, that’s not true. In the 24 hours we have been here, we did visit a supermarket to buy copious amounts of cheese and wine, and we have watched more pointless TV than either of us has seen in the last month combined. And now Husband is sleeping while I listen to my iPod and read trashy gossip rags.
On our way here we bought a stack of magazines from the airport, and, once I had finished OK, Hello, and InStyle, I was forced to move on to Husband’s reading material, which included decidedly more highbrow fodder. I reluctantly flipped open Popular Science and was slightly horrified to find that there was stuff in there that was... you know… interesting.
Despite my holiday resolution to be an intellectual slacker, I was drawn to one article in particular about online education (It’s in the September 2008 issue, pages 54-59, should you be so inclined to read it yourself). I was interested for two reasons: first, there was nothing else to read, and second, I myself have been an online instructor for various universities for the past four years, so I had a frame of reference.
The article was explaining how the prestigious Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT) has made a unique move by creating a free online catalogue of almost all of their course lectures whereby the non-MIT worthy (they only accept 12% of applicants, so don’t feel bad) can view real lectures by real geniuses for their own personal edification.
This got me thinking about the educational opportunities available to expatriates in Norway (and anywhere else really). Last week I had a new expat couple in my office asking about master’s programs in English. The trouble is, outside of Oslo, there are not that many. I felt bad sending them away with only a few options that I gathered seemed less than interesting to them.
So what’s a knowledge hungry expat to do?
Go to school from your laptop, that’s what.
I personally have taken a few classes from American universities to brush up on a lackluster skill set, and I can highly recommend it. But there’s a cost for most courses as for-profit schools have until very recently dominated the market. After reading the Popular Science article, I decided to do some digging for some free options. You won’t get credit, but you also won’t have to write a check.
If you’re looking to learn for learning’s sake (or you’re just bored and need some academic stimulation without the hassle of exams), check out some of the sites below. I’ve listed them from most general to most specialized. The first three are especially good as you can access lectures in every subject under the sun from every university, Ivy League to local community college.
YouTube EDU
iTunes U.
Academic Earth
Big Think
MIT Open Course Ware
Google Code University
Actually, that’s not true. In the 24 hours we have been here, we did visit a supermarket to buy copious amounts of cheese and wine, and we have watched more pointless TV than either of us has seen in the last month combined. And now Husband is sleeping while I listen to my iPod and read trashy gossip rags.
On our way here we bought a stack of magazines from the airport, and, once I had finished OK, Hello, and InStyle, I was forced to move on to Husband’s reading material, which included decidedly more highbrow fodder. I reluctantly flipped open Popular Science and was slightly horrified to find that there was stuff in there that was... you know… interesting.
Despite my holiday resolution to be an intellectual slacker, I was drawn to one article in particular about online education (It’s in the September 2008 issue, pages 54-59, should you be so inclined to read it yourself). I was interested for two reasons: first, there was nothing else to read, and second, I myself have been an online instructor for various universities for the past four years, so I had a frame of reference.
The article was explaining how the prestigious Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT) has made a unique move by creating a free online catalogue of almost all of their course lectures whereby the non-MIT worthy (they only accept 12% of applicants, so don’t feel bad) can view real lectures by real geniuses for their own personal edification.
This got me thinking about the educational opportunities available to expatriates in Norway (and anywhere else really). Last week I had a new expat couple in my office asking about master’s programs in English. The trouble is, outside of Oslo, there are not that many. I felt bad sending them away with only a few options that I gathered seemed less than interesting to them.
So what’s a knowledge hungry expat to do?
Go to school from your laptop, that’s what.
I personally have taken a few classes from American universities to brush up on a lackluster skill set, and I can highly recommend it. But there’s a cost for most courses as for-profit schools have until very recently dominated the market. After reading the Popular Science article, I decided to do some digging for some free options. You won’t get credit, but you also won’t have to write a check.
If you’re looking to learn for learning’s sake (or you’re just bored and need some academic stimulation without the hassle of exams), check out some of the sites below. I’ve listed them from most general to most specialized. The first three are especially good as you can access lectures in every subject under the sun from every university, Ivy League to local community college.
YouTube EDU
iTunes U.
Academic Earth
Big Think
MIT Open Course Ware
Google Code University
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Technophile vs. Technophobe
I can remember the day clearly. It was December of 1995, the end of my first semester of college. I had saved my pennies from my minimum wage gig and raced to the Compaq Outlet. I laid down my cash for the fanciest PC I could afford (which , in retrospect, probably had less memory than my mobile phone does now), carted it home, and plugged it in. Within minutes (really it was more like hours, but I am remembering myself as more skilled than I likely was), I had the free AOL CD installed, and I had registered for a screen name. It was so early in the AOL game that my name consisted only of four letters ('jeel', for the sake of trivia). After a little roaring and spluttering, the modem connected and I was on the net for the first time I can actually recall. I felt like a WIZARD! From that moment until about six or seven years ago, I was a technophile. I felt I had a good grasp on what was happening in the world of computers.
Now I am like a slightly outdated older aunt when it comes to technology. It's funny to hear her talk about the good ol' days at the family reunion, but you pity her a little bit for living in the past. I have become a technophobe.
I marvel at my students and friends and their lofty-sounding discussions of tweeting and blogging and linking up the micronet IP to the submask of jumping jehosaphat (at least that's what I think they're saying). So I decided I was no longer going to sit on the information highway and watch the megabytes whiz by. My new project was to get technophiled again.
So far the results are mixed.
After much goading, I created a Facebook account. I was pretty convinced that FB was only for twelve year old girls and that anyone over this age was just a saddo. I'm not sure my opinion has necessarily changed after a year of use, but the good news is that all the saddos I want to keep up with are on there as well. I find great delight in connecting with my past (and my present) via photos, messages and status updates. For expatriates in particular, having a link to your former existence is comforting as no one is ever more than a 'post comment' away.
Facebook: 8/10
I bought an iPhone and downloaded every application that looked even remotely interesting. I use approximately three of the 72 apps I downloaded (and how I wish that was an exaggerated figure - those 99 cents add up after a while). I do find great joy in Flight Control, which I only recommend if you have plenty of free time and a masochistic need to play 'just one more game, honestly!'. So far the iPhone is used for texts and peeking at Facebook and the odd phone call. I suspect the iPhone could actually tie my shoes and take out the trash, but it just seems like a big investment to learn much more about it.
iPhone: 7/10
I joined Twitter and even installed Tweetie on my iPhone. While I find blogging slightly self-indulgent, I find Twitter downright obnoxious. I guess I wasn't born with the innate need to update the world on my 140-character exploits at every moment of the day. Nor do I really want to read anyone else's. I think Twitter is causing us to miss out on the experience because we're too busy trying to (t)whittle it down to witty text bytes. However, I persevere as I think this is a game-changing technology. Those in oppression and under restriction can use Twitter to speak to the outside world. I want to like Twitter as I see social benefit, but so far I can't quite get my head round it enough to be completely sold.
Twitter: 4/10
And now here I am with Blog. Blog and I have gotten off to a shaky start. I have something to say, and Blog lets me. But Blog is like a needy new boyfriend - he wants more than I am ready to give at this stage in our relationship. He wants me to install meta-tags and enable tracking statistics and format html. These are all things I have no knowledge of and little desire to perform. I feel like the Grumpy Old Man from the Dana Carvey SNL skit: "I'm old and I'm not happy. Everything today is improved and I don't like it. Back in my day, there was no 'comment moderation'. There was no 'edit post'. There was no 'insert link.'. That's the way it was and we LIKED it!" Ignorance is certainly blissful, but I don't want to get left behind, so I will continue poring over the help pages like they are a trashy romance novel.
Blog: TBD/10
I am sure the fact that these four tools are my idea of opening my techno-mind will give a giggle to some of the more progressives out there. But it's a start, and you've got to get in the game to play it. So I'm here, error messages and all.
Now I am like a slightly outdated older aunt when it comes to technology. It's funny to hear her talk about the good ol' days at the family reunion, but you pity her a little bit for living in the past. I have become a technophobe.
I marvel at my students and friends and their lofty-sounding discussions of tweeting and blogging and linking up the micronet IP to the submask of jumping jehosaphat (at least that's what I think they're saying). So I decided I was no longer going to sit on the information highway and watch the megabytes whiz by. My new project was to get technophiled again.
So far the results are mixed.
After much goading, I created a Facebook account. I was pretty convinced that FB was only for twelve year old girls and that anyone over this age was just a saddo. I'm not sure my opinion has necessarily changed after a year of use, but the good news is that all the saddos I want to keep up with are on there as well. I find great delight in connecting with my past (and my present) via photos, messages and status updates. For expatriates in particular, having a link to your former existence is comforting as no one is ever more than a 'post comment' away.
Facebook: 8/10
I bought an iPhone and downloaded every application that looked even remotely interesting. I use approximately three of the 72 apps I downloaded (and how I wish that was an exaggerated figure - those 99 cents add up after a while). I do find great joy in Flight Control, which I only recommend if you have plenty of free time and a masochistic need to play 'just one more game, honestly!'. So far the iPhone is used for texts and peeking at Facebook and the odd phone call. I suspect the iPhone could actually tie my shoes and take out the trash, but it just seems like a big investment to learn much more about it.
iPhone: 7/10
I joined Twitter and even installed Tweetie on my iPhone. While I find blogging slightly self-indulgent, I find Twitter downright obnoxious. I guess I wasn't born with the innate need to update the world on my 140-character exploits at every moment of the day. Nor do I really want to read anyone else's. I think Twitter is causing us to miss out on the experience because we're too busy trying to (t)whittle it down to witty text bytes. However, I persevere as I think this is a game-changing technology. Those in oppression and under restriction can use Twitter to speak to the outside world. I want to like Twitter as I see social benefit, but so far I can't quite get my head round it enough to be completely sold.
Twitter: 4/10
And now here I am with Blog. Blog and I have gotten off to a shaky start. I have something to say, and Blog lets me. But Blog is like a needy new boyfriend - he wants more than I am ready to give at this stage in our relationship. He wants me to install meta-tags and enable tracking statistics and format html. These are all things I have no knowledge of and little desire to perform. I feel like the Grumpy Old Man from the Dana Carvey SNL skit: "I'm old and I'm not happy. Everything today is improved and I don't like it. Back in my day, there was no 'comment moderation'. There was no 'edit post'. There was no 'insert link.'. That's the way it was and we LIKED it!" Ignorance is certainly blissful, but I don't want to get left behind, so I will continue poring over the help pages like they are a trashy romance novel.
Blog: TBD/10
I am sure the fact that these four tools are my idea of opening my techno-mind will give a giggle to some of the more progressives out there. But it's a start, and you've got to get in the game to play it. So I'm here, error messages and all.
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